Wednesday, 20 April 2016

On top of the world!

Anna had a great week last week! She actually had 8 days where she felt pretty good. Saturday night she started to turn again and not feel the best. She was at a friends house for a sleepover. I was going to pick her up but she decided she would stay and just go to sleep. In times like this, I just want to go get her and bring her home, but I am really trying to give Anna some control. If she thinks she can make it through something, I want her to try. We were planning on picking her up around 1 Sunday. She texted around 12:15 asking if we were on our way. I figured she can't be doing that well if she wants to go home. Matt left to grab her. When she got home, she looked so sick. She said they had tried to go for a walk and she just couldn't do it. Her legs had gone numb and she had to sit on the side of the road. She said that at one point, she started to walk into the middle of the road without even realizing it. Thankfully her friend grabbed her! I think sometimes that is the hardest part about her illness. The fact that, besides completely ravaging her body, it also causes her to completely lose all focus and she literally cannot concentrate on anything. When she is in the throes of her illness, her brain does not work the way it's supposed to. At times, you can actually see her thinking;trying to string words together and try and remember things. It's insane!
Anna missed school Monday and Tuesday but was able to go today. Hopefully she will make it through the rest of the week. A couple of months ago, we started acupuncture treatment for Anna. I have read that this can be beneficial for some patients. After every session, she has come home, and about an hour or two later, been completely wasted. It knocks her out! It knocks her out to the point that she can not walk and can barely speak. We have thought about stopping the treatment but after her last session, even though she was so sick after it, she felt pretty good for a while so we're going to give it a few more tries and see how she responds to it. We figure if it causes her to be super sick for one night, but gives her a week of feeling decent, it will be worth it! She had acupuncture today after school. She is not feeling well right now :(  I am praying that it doesn't last long and she soon perks up! I struggle sometimes on whether or not I am making the right decisions. I want so badly for her to be better but it kills me when I decide something for her, and it makes her feel so ill. While she was laying on the acupuncture bed we were chatting about life and her illness. She is so tired of feeling sick. She is so tired of not having energy and having horrible headaches. She is tired of feeling out of breath just walking up a flight of stairs. We started talking about her good days. Anna looked at me and said, 'Mom, on my good days I just don't feel as sick as my bad days, but I never feel good'.
I am praying that she will soon have good days that are actually good days. Days where she feels on top of the world!

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